Title: Journey Through Darkness

Author: Alexa Sorosin

Rating: PG

How can they not see? Sometimes, I think they are blind.

How can they not hear? My pleas fall on deaf ears.

Can they not feel? I am certain that they do.

So why?

Why?

Before their eyes I fall, from my highest to my lowest. But they do not see.

For so long, I have hidden, but now, in the light of day, my life is still in darkness.

Surrounded by people, including them, I am alone.

Solace offered by Those I cannot see.

Who’s loving arms I cannot feel around me.

The depths of my despair grow and grow, but still Those hands reach out to me.

But here, in this land, so far from where my home is, They cannot catch me.

Surrounded by those who cannot see or hear me I am utterly alone.

They claim that they care, that they do see, hear, and feel me.

But now, in the darkness of day, I see, hear, and feel them.

I see their happiness, disappointment, fear, and frustration.

All aimed at their current activity.

I hear their complaints, their excited murmurs of jobs well done.

I feel their apprehension, excitement, and disappointment.

Each of these I respond to, offering consolation, or praise.

However, my own emotions and stories rarely receive the same.

They might listen, but so often, I am brushed aside.

As if I were merely a scrap of the wood used to create the artful masterpiece.

My eyes see the glances of those I do not know.

Their eyes may hold contempt, or disgust, or fear.

But never have they held compassion, or friendship.

Often, I have tried to meet their standards, yet, every time, I fall short.

Those who love me wonder why I feel that I must prove myself to them.

The only answer I can give, though, is that I must.

The hours pass like years in this place, alone, in the darkness.

I wonder if any of them would notice if the darkness consumed me.

Swallowed me whole like a mouth, leading into the depths of Hell.

Sometimes, I do not think that they would.

Only Those who love me would notice my absence.

Over and over I ponder the darkness, but always, I am too afraid to break free.

So here I sit, awaiting my coming fate, the dread building within me.

I know that I will survive this test, even if I do not pass it.

Fear grips me as the trial approaches, many times I have felt its icy grasp.

No more can I hold off this test of my abilities.

I face it with head held high.

Then once again, I wait.

Thinking, wondering when it will all be over.

When will I be back with Those I cannot see or touch?

I close my eyes and the memories approach.

Times spent with Those I love, my life is happy with Them.

But then, they took me away from where I was, and placed me here.

Alone.

In the vast darkness.

Memories of other trials, other places, of darkness.

They come now to the surface and try to overwhelm me.

Frantically searching, seeking an escape from this dark place, I call out for help, but no sound leaves my lips.

Those around me stare with eyes unseeing as I desperately try to claw my way free of this prison of memory.

When finally, I begin to lose hope, I stop fighting.

The darkness surrounds me, sensing my surrender.

I drop, defeated, to my knees, awaiting the final blow.

Then out of the darkness, a voice I hear.

I look up and see the form of the one who saves me, who drives away the darkness.

He reminds me of things long forgotten.

The love of Those I cannot see.

The love of He who has never forsaken me.

As he lifts me up from my knees, I can see him as he truly is:

A light, guiding me back to Those I love.

An Angel, leading me home.